Step One

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol---that our lives had become unmanageable.

I always new I had "issues" with alcohol and drugs but I was never convinced that I was an alcoholic. I had never been arrested for a DUI. I didn't lose the people in my life. I wasn't living on the streets....etc. I always thought "true" alcoholics were the bums on the streets. How wrong I was. I was a functioning alcoholic in denial.

In my first meeting, when I looked around the room, it hit me that the people in there didn't look like alcoholics. Ok, well some did. Again, my thinking was wrong. There is no face for alcoholism. I finally admitted that I was powerless over alcohol. I said "My name is Sheri and I am an alcoholic." The relief of coming to that realization was overwhelming and peaceful at the same time.

Step One to be cont....

Robbing Someone of Their Own Experience

I went to the women's meeting last night at Maryann's and I had her check out this blog. It dawned on my that she had been a re-tread just once. But, her experience led her to the conclusion, without doubt, that she is definately an alcoholic. So I must remember that everyone gets "it" in their own time. My lesson is to not rob anyone of their own experience. It makes you stronger.

My father is an active alcoholic. I was talking to my half brother and he stated that he always cleans up "Dad's messes." A good example of robbing someone of their own experience. My brother was all proud that he did this for Dad and I just looked at him and said "Why do you do that?" Personally, in my opinion, Dad will hit bottom (or die) faster if he was to claim all responsibility for his actions. If you are an alcoholic reading this, you know the odds are not in his favor.

What the H***

I am feeling really crazy for starting a blog when there are so many out there. My thinking (which so often gets me in trouble) is to share my experience with alcoholism/addiction and my current state in Recovery.

My sobriety birthday is June 15, 2006 and I am not a re-tread. For those that do not know what a re-tread is, it is a person that bounces in and out of the rooms of AA. When I decided to go to an AA meeting I only intended to "stick around" for maybe a few days or a month. Here I sit two years and three months later still sober. I am not a dry drunk either. I have found true sobriety.

Until my next entry I will leave one of those crazy acronym's that AAers love so much.

The "ISM" in alcoholism = Incredibly Short Memory or I Sabatoge Myself